Overthinking is something most of us experience from time to time. But when it becomes a regular habit, that’s another story. It can hold us back, disrupt our sleep and affect our mental health.
The process happens when we obsess over thoughts. And they’re usually negative thoughts, those that can take over during the day and keep us awake at night. For example, maybe you can’t stop replaying a mistake from the past. Or you’re worrying about something that might happen in the future. These invasive negative thoughts can cause stress and anxiety that won’t easily go away.
And if you struggle with overthinking, you’re definitely not alone. Author and keynote speaker Jon Acuf surveyed more than 10,000 people and found that 99.5 percent said they deal with it.
What is overthinking?
Overthinking basically comes in three forms:
Rumination – This is when you dwell on past events, focusing on what went wrong. You may think about what you should have done differently or how you failed. It could be a conflict with a friend or decisions that led to incarceration. These thoughts can become all consuming, leading to depression and metal exhaustion.
Worry – Worry focuses on the future. You imagine worst-case scenarios and fixate on things beyond your control that may never happen. This pattern often fuels anxiety.
Analysis paralysis – This occurs when you overanalyze choices to the point where you can’t make a decision. The internet can make this worse. For example, you might spend too much time comparing restaurants in a new city, afraid of making the wrong choice, until deciding feels impossible.
How to deal with overthinking
There are many ways to deal with overthinking. You may need to try a few to find what works best for you.
Redirect your thoughts. When your mind starts to ruminate, try to turn your attention to something more positive like a recent success you had in an rinterview or a meaningful conversation.
Focus on the present. The past is over and can’t be changed. Ask yourself what the experience taught you and how it can guide better decisions moving forward.
Reexamine your negative thoughts. If you’re worried about something happening in the future, ask yourself: “What are the actual chances that it will?”
Solve what you can. If a concern is realistic, focus on action. Maybe you’re worried about not being able to pay the bills in a couple of months. If that is the case, you might want to put together a budget and stick to it, and look on Craigslist for a gig job or two.
Exercise. Whether it’s a walk outside or time at the gym, physical activity can boost your mood and reduce stress. Exercise can restore your spirits and create endorphins that can help relieve stress and make you feel better.
Distract yourself. Spend time doing things you enjoy, whether it’s watching a movie, reading a book, gardening or having coffee with a friend. A healthy distraction can interrupt negative thought cycles.
Practice breathing exercises. One simple method is box breathing: inhale for four seconds through your nose, hold for four, exhale for four through your mouth, and hold again for four. Repeat several times to calm your body and mind.
Try a grounding exercise. This is a type of mindful exercise, and one example is imagining that you’re a tree with roots firmly in the ground. Leaves that fall from your tree are like thoughts that come and go. You can observe them objectively without making judgements while being rooted. You can find an excellent video explaining the process on the Headspace website.
Learn mindful meditation. Mindful meditation teaches you to focus on the present moment, learn to control your emotions, and increase self-awareness and acceptance. A free course you can take can help you deal with overthinking issues in the future. This is a major investment of your time but can be very beneficial for the long term.
Create a worry time. Set aside 10 or 15 minutes for worry time. Think about your worries. You can also write them down. That will help you get them out of your system and make It easier to move on.
Limit online exposure. Reduce time spent on social media and news. Too much information can overwhelm your mind with negativity and things outside of your control.
Be kind to yourself. Don’t beat yourself up for things you did in the past. Treat yourself with kindness, and focus on making better choices going forward.
Practice gratitude. Focusing on what’s good in your life, a sense of gratitude, can help counterbalance negative thinking patterns.
Change your soundtrack. Jon Acuf, in his book Soundtracks, offers a unique perspective, comparing thoughts to soundtracks that you might hear over and over again in your mind.
“If the soundtracks you listen to are positive, your thoughts can be your best friend,” he writes. “If your day is spent overthinking broken soundtracks your thoughts can be you worst foe, holding you back from all the things you want in life.”
And how does he recommend dealing with those broken soundtracks, the negative ones that can make your life miserable?
His solution is simple:
- Retire your broken soundtracks.
- Replace them with new ones.
- Repeat them until they’re as automatic as the old ones.
While overthinking can overtake your life, it doesn’t have to. By trying some of these practices you may be able to get your rumination, worry and/or analysis paralysis under control and free up your mind for clearer, more positive thinking.
